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Momo II: Another try
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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

TOPIC: Momo II: Another try 49022 Views

Re: Momo II: Another try 03 Jun 2010 11:23 #68612

  • briut
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Wow, Momo. I was just in the midst of typing out a little ditty to let you know I was rooting for you. (Okay, I'll share it with you, just for grins. It was:
There are seven days,
there are seven days,
there are seven days in the week.
Sunday Monday,
Tuesday Wednesday,
Thursday Friday,
Momo Kodesh.

But now I see that little ditties are not the point. So, really, )

I see you saying:
"Why can't I focus on the fact that I did a lot of good this week, even though some of what I thought was good really wasn't in the end? Why focus on the negative? Why do I demand perfection of myself?"

And I realize: It's probably the answers to questions like THESE that get us clean, get us straight, get us back to being eved Hashem in all aspects. Not the focus on our , not the head stuck in the hand while hoping for a miracle. And 'fer sure not (just) the little ditties of songs.

And you're still plugging away at that stuff, the stuff that counts. Plugging, for as long as it takes. What a gibbur! What dveikus. Wow.

Oh, yeah, ditty time. KOT. KUTGW. Blahblahblah. In case that helps, too.
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Re: Momo II: Another try 03 Jun 2010 11:40 #68613

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Briut, you're right. And your ditty is cute too. 
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Re: Momo II: Another try 03 Jun 2010 13:37 #68634

  • Eye.nonymous
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Momo wrote on 03 Jun 2010 11:15:

Thanks Steve.

Why do I care so much what other people think of me and my work?
Why can't I focus on the fact that I did a lot of good this week, even though some of what I thought was good really wasn't in the end?
Why focus on the negative? Why do I demand perfection of myself?


Have you ever just tried not to give a da*n what other people think of you?  Have you ever just tried to focus on the positive?  To accept that you tried your best, and let that be good enough?

WHY ask WHY?  Just TRY!

  --Eye.
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Re: Momo II: Another try 03 Jun 2010 16:03 #68689

  • Steve
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Dear Mo-Man,

It's all a test. DC gave us a line to remember: 'It's ALL G-d, ALL the time!" Not only is He the only One who is perfect, but He controls everything, not me and not you. He is writing (and editing) the script of my life, places me on the stage of this life, and wants me to learn from how I react to life how to become humble and giving, and thru that (and Torah and Mitzvos, of course) build a closer relationship with Him.

We want life to go OUR way, not G-d's, and get upset when our wants are not forthcoming. We get resentful, and we fear cuz we begin to imagine more negative outcomes. All that puts us in pain, and to escape the pain, we turn to false pleasures of P and M and run away from facing life on G-D's terms.

So you see, Momo, our expecting perfection from ourselves when we are really only human, and our need for approval from peers to feel fulfilled, is all part of that vicious cycle. We don't have pain because we have low self-esteem, we have low self-esteem BECAUSE we are in pain when life doesn't go our way.

The way out of this cycle, the way to feel more POSITIVE about ourselves, is to change our perspective on how we view the "stuff of life."

Realize that Hashem is sending you MESSAGES with every encounter you have. He wants us to focus less on ourselves, and more on others. Instead of thinking in the negative, self-absorbed mode of "Why didn't my boss see all the GOOD work I did also," we could think in the POSITIVE unselfish mode of "Wow! I thought that part of my work was as well done as the other part, but I'm thankful I was shown where parts need correction. Perhaps I can concentrate better than I have been while I work for someone who is paying me to get things done the way he wants."

Then, couple that with an added dose of forgiveness and understanding: "I know I'm trying, I'm just doing the best that I can. And so is my boss, he's just doing the best that HE can, under all his pressures and needs that I know nothing about. The parts of my work that need correction must have been more important to him than i thought, that's why he didn't notice the correct things I've done." or maybe "Perhaps he's a person that always focusses on the negative, especially when he's paying the bill. Maybe he can't help it. Perhaps i could be more considerate of his feelings, too."

Focussing away from ourselves, we begin to CARE more about helping others and feeling for THEIR needs and pain. When we focus less on ourselves, we see the available positive outcomes that allow us to give MEANING and PURPOSE to what we thought were negatives. And so WE GET OUT OF PAIN. This is the catalyst to a happier life, without resentments and fears (the stuff of RID). And the SIDE BENEFIT of that, of course, is that we no longer have the need to stupefy ourselves, and the desire to view P or act out goes..... POOF!!

Love,

Steve
No one is so small that he can not give help, and no one is so big that he doesn't need it.

Kol HaOlam Kulo, Gesher Tzar Meod, V'HaIkkar: Lo L'Pacheid Klal.
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Re: Momo II: Another try 06 Jun 2010 05:40 #68993

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Thanks Steve!

10 clean days. 
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Re: Momo II: Another try 06 Jun 2010 08:50 #69012

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10 - recaptured the Aseret Hadibrot!
Keep climbing, were right behind you!
Hashem is addicted to you! Feel His hugs!"Sheva yipol tzaddik VKUM"
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Re: Momo II: Another try 06 Jun 2010 12:29 #69033

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Congrats, chaver
Admin put these lines here cuz he likes 'em:
"The heart needs to be broken when will-power is not enough"
"Get off the 18-Wheeler and onto a tricycle!"
"The heck with me, what can I do for you?"
"I do not particularly care exactly which "lav" suicide is. I'm not interested in it for other reasons!"
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Re: Momo II: Another try 06 Jun 2010 12:33 #69034

  • Eye.nonymous
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GMG!
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Re: Momo II: Another try 06 Jun 2010 17:15 #69088

  • the.guard
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This is my first post on the forum since returning from the "big trip".

I just thought I'd stop by and say "Hi" to our hero, Momo, who never, I mean NEVER, gives up.
Webmaster of www.guardyoureyes.org - Maintaining Moral Purity in Today's World. We’re here on a quest ; it’s really all a test. Just do your best and G-d will do the rest.
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Re: Momo II: Another try 06 Jun 2010 17:26 #69091

  • Ineedhelp!!
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Whoa!

MOMO AND GUARD back on the same day!!!!

Drama on GYE. Sounds like a soap opera in the making....
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Re: Momo II: Another try 06 Jun 2010 17:30 #69092

  • briut
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Yiddle2 wrote on 06 Jun 2010 17:26:
MOMO AND GUARD back on the same day!!!!

YiddleDos: have you ever seen the two of them in the same room together? In other words, do you think they could be one and the same person? The soap opera continues.

Momo, any words in your own defense? (Or, if you're really a British palace guard, defenCe?)
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Re: Momo II: Another try 06 Jun 2010 19:18 #69096

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First, I am not Guard!

Second, sorry to disappoint, but after 10 days I fell today. I hope to start again tomorrow. *sigh*
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Re: Momo II: Another try 06 Jun 2010 20:07 #69108

  • me3
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Tell you one thing this Momo guy aint no quitter. You can beat him here and the but he just bounces right back up. And in the end he's going to win.
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Re: Momo II: Another try 07 Jun 2010 05:15 #69202

  • Momo
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What do you think should be written on my tombstone, besides my name and date of birth/death?
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Re: Momo II: Another try 07 Jun 2010 05:54 #69208

  • Dov
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Your real name, for one thing....there I go again....
Admin put these lines here cuz he likes 'em:
"The heart needs to be broken when will-power is not enough"
"Get off the 18-Wheeler and onto a tricycle!"
"The heck with me, what can I do for you?"
"I do not particularly care exactly which "lav" suicide is. I'm not interested in it for other reasons!"
Last Edit: by .
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