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Shmilu's renewed quest for purity
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TOPIC: Shmilu's renewed quest for purity 7943 Views

Re: Shmilu's renewed quest for purity 03 Jun 2010 16:18 #68702

  • Dov
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Too bad there isn't a Viagra for those impotenses....oops.
Admin put these lines here cuz he likes 'em:
"The heart needs to be broken when will-power is not enough"
"Get off the 18-Wheeler and onto a tricycle!"
"The heck with me, what can I do for you?"
"I do not particularly care exactly which "lav" suicide is. I'm not interested in it for other reasons!"
Last Edit: by .

Re: Shmilu's renewed quest for purity 03 Jun 2010 16:41 #68728

  • SoHard,YetSoRewarding
Lol.
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Re: Shmilu's renewed quest for purity 04 Jun 2010 01:08 #68812

  • SoHard,YetSoRewarding
Day 17:

Slipped.
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Re: Shmilu's renewed quest for purity 06 Jun 2010 06:03 #68995

  • silentbattle
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The question is, what did you learn from your slip, and how did you grow from it?
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Re: Shmilu's renewed quest for purity 07 Jun 2010 02:18 #69182

  • SoHard,YetSoRewarding
Day 14:

Despite only slipping, I decided to impose punishment on myself and scale back my count by a third.
Therefore, instead of day 20, today is day 14.
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Re: Shmilu's renewed quest for purity 07 Jun 2010 02:22 #69185

  • SoHard,YetSoRewarding
What did I learn? I learned that in this fight, one needs to be extremely careful and take a guarded approach, especially when doing well, for no one knows when the Y"H will throw us a loop...
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Re: Shmilu's renewed quest for purity 07 Jun 2010 06:08 #69210

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I would strongly recommend against such a "punishment." It also isn't honest - coutning days gives you an idea, at least, of how much clean time you have behind you. You have 21 days. That seems honest, to me.

It's true - even when things seem smooth, we need to work on preparing ourselves, growing, getting healthier. But I meant more specifically. In the same situation, what could you do differently?
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Re: Shmilu's renewed quest for purity 07 Jun 2010 10:40 #69225

  • briut
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I agree with SB. Brutal self-honesty is so important, whether it's working in our favor or ch'v against us.  Honest weights and measures are a big mitzvah, whether we're cheating the customer or the storekeeper.

Just one man's opinion. YMMV (your mileage may vary).
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Re: Shmilu's renewed quest for purity 10 Jun 2010 15:50 #69885

  • SoHard,YetSoRewarding
Hmmmm, how do I put this...

Ok... Fresh start.
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Re: Shmilu's renewed quest for purity 10 Jun 2010 16:33 #69892

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just as a tip, i'd say that you post here how you kept your success going. You had at least 21 days (probably longer) and that is fantastic. do you have any ideas on how you'll make it to 22 days next time?
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Re: Shmilu's renewed quest for purity 10 Jun 2010 23:14 #70002

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Back to the "punishments" for a second:

Being an addict, the whole idea of "punishing myself" makes me return to being a big, fat, ba'al ga'avah again. Meaning that it'd return me to the useless grand illusion that I can beat this problem with enoughtachbulos, ohrma, and strength. I am not baylim over my recovery - just as I was not baylim over my addiction. 

Hatzlocha.
Admin put these lines here cuz he likes 'em:
"The heart needs to be broken when will-power is not enough"
"Get off the 18-Wheeler and onto a tricycle!"
"The heck with me, what can I do for you?"
"I do not particularly care exactly which "lav" suicide is. I'm not interested in it for other reasons!"
Last Edit: by .

Re: Shmilu's renewed quest for purity 15 Aug 2010 08:41 #76532

  • SoHard,YetSoRewarding
Ok, so I started off Elul on the wrong foot. What else is new?

2 falls in as many days...
It's looking grim.
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Re: Shmilu's renewed quest for purity 03 Sep 2010 18:33 #77781

  • Dov
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One

freakin

day

at

a

time

PERIOD!

AHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sorry. I feel better now......

b'ahava,

Dov

Admin put these lines here cuz he likes 'em:
"The heart needs to be broken when will-power is not enough"
"Get off the 18-Wheeler and onto a tricycle!"
"The heck with me, what can I do for you?"
"I do not particularly care exactly which "lav" suicide is. I'm not interested in it for other reasons!"
Last Edit: by .

Re: Shmilu's renewed quest for purity 03 Oct 2010 17:56 #79396

  • SoHard,YetSoRewarding
I'm feeling great now with the help of the Echod Yuchid I'Myichod, b"H.
Day 6!
Ya'azoir Hashem Hol'oh!
The brisk weather here is also doing wonders; It puts me in a better mood, which consequently leads to less stress, which in turn leads to... LESS PROBLEMS WITH THE MASHCHIS!!!
Gvirois Hashem! Gvirois Hashem!
Brich Rachmonoh!!!
Last Edit: 03 Oct 2010 17:58 by .

Re: Shmilu's renewed quest for purity 05 Oct 2010 00:55 #79501

  • SoHard,YetSoRewarding
Ois Mishomayim!:
I felt pretty weak last night, succumbed to my urges and keyed in some undesirable (to Hashem) keywords into my web browser.

Inexplicably, my browser ceased to function! I couldn't help but look upwards and smile...

Day 7!
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