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On the Way to 90-Days

Work in progress
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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!
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TOPIC: Work in progress 2346 Views

Work in progress 02 Jan 2022 18:43 #375452

  • Vehkam
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Trying to post here on a somewhat regular basis so that I stay on course.  I have to rewire my thinking patterns of over thirty years!  I set the counter to the last date that I fell in masturbation.  I have been able to stay away from other things for longer.  I thank hashem for his kindness in helping me to this point.  

this shabbos I was in Florida.  Obviously there are a lot more nisyonos.  I definitely was more successful than other times in not following my eyes and gazing with the help of GYE. (Not to say that I was successful in every instance- at some point my feet just took me in the wrong direction even though my mind was saying- STOP!)  
One thing that helped me alot was a shiur I heard recently that describes the power of a tefila that one has immediately after he withstands a nisayon.       When I feel a possible weakness to a temptation, I quickly resolve to turn away and then I immediately daven for something that is very important to me.  Each small victory is another tefila.  I don’t want these nisyonos, but if they are coming anyway at least I have the opportunity to use them for something very meaningful.   
https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/375452-Work-in-progress

The Battle of the Generation by Hillel S. has been a huge help for me.  Message me to find out how you can receive a free copy.

some of the experiences I write about may make it easier to identify me.  This is ok.  I trust that if anyone discovers my identity they will keep it to themselves.  Please know that if you do realize that you  know me, I am completely comfortable and welcome you acknowledging me and my struggle in person.

Re: Work in progress 03 Jan 2022 12:14 #375466

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Posting regularly is very wise. It keeps us focused and connected with the chevra here. It also gives us the opportunity to inspire others. Hatzlocha.
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE

Re: Work in progress 09 Jan 2022 14:30 #375712

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Bh. It’s 70 days since I committed to stay off of prngrafic websites. I feel truly blessed that hashem has made this relatively nisayon free and daven that it continues that way.  
It takes a long time to rewire 30 years of the thinking but only a second to  turn towards the right direction!
https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/375452-Work-in-progress

The Battle of the Generation by Hillel S. has been a huge help for me.  Message me to find out how you can receive a free copy.

some of the experiences I write about may make it easier to identify me.  This is ok.  I trust that if anyone discovers my identity they will keep it to themselves.  Please know that if you do realize that you  know me, I am completely comfortable and welcome you acknowledging me and my struggle in person.

Re: Work in progress 09 Jan 2022 20:45 #375729

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Keep it up tzaddik!
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE

Re: Work in progress 09 Jan 2022 23:16 #375739

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Thank you. Each comment means a lot to me. 
https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/375452-Work-in-progress

The Battle of the Generation by Hillel S. has been a huge help for me.  Message me to find out how you can receive a free copy.

some of the experiences I write about may make it easier to identify me.  This is ok.  I trust that if anyone discovers my identity they will keep it to themselves.  Please know that if you do realize that you  know me, I am completely comfortable and welcome you acknowledging me and my struggle in person.

Re: Work in progress 10 Jan 2022 03:26 #375741

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One thing that helped me alot was a shiur I heard recently that describes the power of a tefila that one has immediately after he withstands a nisayon.       When I feel a possible weakness to a temptation, I quickly resolve to turn away and then I immediately daven for something that is very important to me.  Each small victory is another tefila.  I don’t want these nisyonos, but if they are coming anyway at least I have the opportunity to use them for something very meaningful.  

sounds beautiful cannot wait to try it thank you for sharing  

Re: Work in progress 17 Jan 2022 22:10 #376059

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Bh now at 78 days since I stopped looking at websites and worse.  I am looking forward to working with a therapist to build on this success.  I am very thankful but also slightly confused because Bh I have not had  any strong taivos. I know that this is a gift from Hashem.  In the back of my mind I am worried about what will happen when I am tested… hopefully by then I will have some strong gedarim in place.   Have any of you seen similar success in your initial battle? I am wondering if my age is a factor here…I feel like it’s now or never for this fight. 
https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/375452-Work-in-progress

The Battle of the Generation by Hillel S. has been a huge help for me.  Message me to find out how you can receive a free copy.

some of the experiences I write about may make it easier to identify me.  This is ok.  I trust that if anyone discovers my identity they will keep it to themselves.  Please know that if you do realize that you  know me, I am completely comfortable and welcome you acknowledging me and my struggle in person.

Re: Work in progress 18 Jan 2022 13:48 #376085

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Vehkam wrote on 17 Jan 2022 22:10:
Bh now at 78 days since I stopped looking at websites and worse.  I am looking forward to working with a therapist to build on this success.  I am very thankful but also slightly confused because Bh I have not had  any strong taivos. I know that this is a gift from Hashem.  In the back of my mind I am worried about what will happen when I am tested… hopefully by then I will have some strong gedarim in place.   Have any of you seen similar success in your initial battle? I am wondering if my age is a factor here…I feel like it’s now or never for this fight. 

no what your experiencing is so so normal IT IS EASY good for you! you are no longer a user check it out easypeasymethod.org/easypeasy.pdf

Re: Work in progress 28 Jan 2022 04:40 #376591

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Tomorrow is 90 days since I committed to clean up my life.  Bh I have not watched or seen anything prngrphic.  I have not fantasized and have tried hard to redirect my thoughts.  If I have time I will buy myself an ice cream tomorrow!
https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/375452-Work-in-progress

The Battle of the Generation by Hillel S. has been a huge help for me.  Message me to find out how you can receive a free copy.

some of the experiences I write about may make it easier to identify me.  This is ok.  I trust that if anyone discovers my identity they will keep it to themselves.  Please know that if you do realize that you  know me, I am completely comfortable and welcome you acknowledging me and my struggle in person.

Re: Work in progress 03 Feb 2022 22:55 #376824

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You are a hero!
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE

Re: Work in progress 03 Feb 2022 23:45 #376827

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Wasn’t sure where to post this question-
I ordered a copy of the book The Battle of the Generation .  Do you think it’s OK for me to leave it around when my adult sons and their friends are over for Shabbos.  Most of them are not makpid at all on shmiras einayim.  I bought it for myself, but I was thinking it might be a good conversation starter….
https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/375452-Work-in-progress

The Battle of the Generation by Hillel S. has been a huge help for me.  Message me to find out how you can receive a free copy.

some of the experiences I write about may make it easier to identify me.  This is ok.  I trust that if anyone discovers my identity they will keep it to themselves.  Please know that if you do realize that you  know me, I am completely comfortable and welcome you acknowledging me and my struggle in person.

Re: Work in progress 04 Feb 2022 12:26 #376848

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Great idea if all the guys coming you can assume have been exposed. Obviously if a real temimusdik guy will be there you may be opening a Pandora's box - and yes there still are such guys around.

If the crowd is an exposed crowd you are doing a great thing - i assume many of them are looking for chizuk, help, advice, and simply were too embarassed or didn't know where to turn. You are being mezakeh es ha'rabim!
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE

Re: Work in progress 04 Feb 2022 14:53 #376855

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Vehkam wrote on 03 Feb 2022 23:45:
Wasn’t sure where to post this question-
I ordered a copy of the book The Battle of the Generation .  Do you think it’s OK for me to leave it around when my adult sons and their friends are over for Shabbos.  Most of them are not makpid at all on shmiras einayim.  I bought it for myself, but I was thinking it might be a good conversation starter….

The book The Battle of the Generation is written in a very careful & sensitive way. It does not mention any explicit terms and it's safe even for people that were not exposed. You will have a great mitzvah and zechus if other people start being more careful with shmiras einayim this is a classic case of mezakeh es ha'rabim!
"If I am not for myself, who will be for me? But if I am only for myself, who am I? If not now, when?"
feel free to reach out @  ahavayirah@gmail.com

Re: Work in progress 04 Feb 2022 18:56 #376868

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Thanks. I will definitely leave it around also just picked up a copy of a new Siddur by Rabbi Feigenbaum. I only read the introduction so far but it looks like it will be amazing for people who have a hard time connecting to davening.
https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/375452-Work-in-progress

The Battle of the Generation by Hillel S. has been a huge help for me.  Message me to find out how you can receive a free copy.

some of the experiences I write about may make it easier to identify me.  This is ok.  I trust that if anyone discovers my identity they will keep it to themselves.  Please know that if you do realize that you  know me, I am completely comfortable and welcome you acknowledging me and my struggle in person.

Re: Work in progress 06 Feb 2022 16:59 #376906

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Vehkam wrote on 04 Feb 2022 18:56:
Thanks. I will definitely leave it around also just picked up a copy of a new Siddur by Rabbi Feigenbaum. I only read the introduction so far but it looks like it will be amazing for people who have a hard time connecting to davening.

Following up...
How was Shabbos? Did you end up leaving the book around? Any reactions?
"If I am not for myself, who will be for me? But if I am only for myself, who am I? If not now, when?"
feel free to reach out @  ahavayirah@gmail.com
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