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Giving a Genuine Try
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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

TOPIC: Giving a Genuine Try 4839 Views

Re: Giving a Genuine Try 17 Nov 2021 04:38 #374348

  • omekhadavar
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Day #5
I made it to day 5. This is where I lost my streak last time. I made sure to make a neder to keep myself away from non-necessary internet use. I hope to try and beat my last streak. 
Overall, the day went really well. I kept busy the whole day and even went on a walk. I'm going to try and keep busy for the rest of the week. The past few days were hard, but I feel that its gotten better today.
Signing off for the night,
-Dvar Ha'emek
“Stop worrying about the world ending today. It’s already tomorrow in Australia.”
-Charlie Brown

Re: Giving a Genuine Try 17 Nov 2021 12:06 #374353

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Getting fresh air and exercise are very helpful (as is getting a good night's sleep as written in your previous post).

Regarding the exhaustion piece, once you really know and believe that it is in your head, and therefore in your control, you can remind yourself that exhaustion is a temporary issue....
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE

Re: Giving a Genuine Try 22 Nov 2021 05:01 #374482

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Day #9
I've almost made it to my best streak. I made a neder last week and it helped tremendously. I don't have as many urges when I know acting out is not an option.
Today was an intense day. I had a couple of assignments due, so I was kept busy throughout the day. Towards the end of the day I felt a wave of exhaustion. BH, there were no urges.
Signing off for the night,
-Dvar Ha'emek
“Stop worrying about the world ending today. It’s already tomorrow in Australia.”
-Charlie Brown

Re: Giving a Genuine Try 22 Nov 2021 12:21 #374489

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It is great to have a short term goal of a streak, be it an amount of days, or a goal (ex - i will stay clean through Chanukah...)  However, at the same time, start telling yourself that if you can be clean for 9 days what is stopping you for being clean for 90 or 900 days? There is no actual build up of a physiological need to masturbate. It is completely imagined. The "pressure" people feel is in the mind. The proof? We are not made like volcanoes. If someone does not ejaculate for let's say 100 days, and then he does, the same amount of zera comes out as after a 3 day break. If there was a "buildup", a few gallons would have to come out... and that simply does not happen, because there is no buildup. Someone like you who Bh has gotten himself past the yi'ush mode of acting out every day or two - ( guys in that matzav unfortunately simply do not believe it is possible to stay clean more than 48 hours ) - can tell the yetzer hara to "jump in the lake", or maybe more appropriately to "go to H..." where he truly belongs. Yes, we get urges, even strong ones, but they are temporary and fake. We need to eat, we  need to sleep. These can't be pushed off indefinitely. We do not need to ejaculate. It can be pushed off for married life. hatzlacha buddy.
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE

Re: Giving a Genuine Try 22 Nov 2021 14:23 #374493

  • Trouble
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Hashem Help Me wrote on 22 Nov 2021 12:21:
It is great to have a short term goal of a streak, be it an amount of days, or a goal (ex - i will stay clean through Chanukah...)  However, at the same time, start telling yourself that if you can be clean for 9 days what is stopping you for being clean for 90 or 900 days? There is no actual build up of a physiological need to masturbate. It is completely imagined. The "pressure" people feel is in the mind. The proof? We are not made like volcanoes. If someone does not ejaculate for let's say 100 days, and then he does, the same amount of zera comes out as after a 3 day break. If there was a "buildup", a few gallons would have to come out... and that simply does not happen, because there is no buildup. Someone like you who Bh has gotten himself past the yi'ush mode of acting out every day or two - ( guys in that matzav unfortunately simply do not believe it is possible to stay clean more than 48 hours ) - can tell the yetzer hara to "jump in the lake", or maybe more appropriately to "go to H..." where he truly belongs. Yes, we get urges, even strong ones, but they are temporary and fake. We need to eat, we  need to sleep. These can't be pushed off indefinitely. We do not need to ejaculate. It can be pushed off for married life. hatzlacha buddy.

because you're giving good advice, i don't wanna argue or question here on your "build-up-thesis," which you constantly say; please advise where you think it's appropriate; thanks good fellow

maggid from nauru - formerly known as pleasant island - only country in the world w/o a capital [letters] - the place you go when you be looking for trouble
I'm all about that (substantial) bass, no trouble ....
Last Edit: 22 Nov 2021 14:24 by Trouble.

Re: Giving a Genuine Try 23 Nov 2021 02:34 #374511

Trouble wrote on 22 Nov 2021 14:23:

Hashem Help Me wrote on 22 Nov 2021 12:21:
It is great to have a short term goal of a streak, be it an amount of days, or a goal (ex - i will stay clean through Chanukah...)  However, at the same time, start telling yourself that if you can be clean for 9 days what is stopping you for being clean for 90 or 900 days? There is no actual build up of a physiological need to masturbate. It is completely imagined. The "pressure" people feel is in the mind. The proof? We are not made like volcanoes. If someone does not ejaculate for let's say 100 days, and then he does, the same amount of zera comes out as after a 3 day break. If there was a "buildup", a few gallons would have to come out... and that simply does not happen, because there is no buildup. Someone like you who Bh has gotten himself past the yi'ush mode of acting out every day or two - ( guys in that matzav unfortunately simply do not believe it is possible to stay clean more than 48 hours ) - can tell the yetzer hara to "jump in the lake", or maybe more appropriately to "go to H..." where he truly belongs. Yes, we get urges, even strong ones, but they are temporary and fake. We need to eat, we  need to sleep. These can't be pushed off indefinitely. We do not need to ejaculate. It can be pushed off for married life. hatzlacha buddy.

because you're giving good advice, i don't wanna argue or question here on your "build-up-thesis," which you constantly say; please advise where you think it's appropriate; thanks good fellow

maggid from nauru - formerly known as pleasant island - only country in the world w/o a capital [letters] - the place you go when you be looking for trouble

@Trouble I would be very interested in hearing the counter argument if you have it!  This is a subject that interests (and at times perplexes) me greatly.  Although recently I've been tending to agree with HHM's thesis.  Thanks! 
If you are really bored, you can check out my original thread here: guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/305558-Journey-of-one-day-at-a-time 

"Think good and it will be good!"

Re: Giving a Genuine Try 23 Nov 2021 04:40 #374514

  • omekhadavar
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Day #10
I made it to Day 10, tomorrow is where I made it to the last time. I need to extend my neder.
Today was a great day. I had a couple of intense urges, but they calmed down. I went to a Chasuna and BH there was no problem with shmiras einayim. Iy"h everything will go smooth tomorrow, and then I'll be at my best streak.
Signing off for the night,
-Dvar Ha'emek
“Stop worrying about the world ending today. It’s already tomorrow in Australia.”
-Charlie Brown

Re: Giving a Genuine Try 23 Nov 2021 15:09 #374530

  • Trouble
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i don't wanna say what this process is called, for then it will be easier for others to google the term, and that is not my intention. studies, doctors and specialists have advised certain people to become excited, then stop, then start again, then stop, etc. the reason is because it builds excitement and intensifies the orgasm and experience. there are other reasons as well - it is a method used to help folks last longer. this does not mean that there is an increase of sperm. but there is a build up of excitement.

now, as far as his main thesis, there are those who disagree; perhaps there is not more sperm, but there are buffer fluids and other stuff that are increased. again, like we said before, there is a greater intensity (which has some physical ramifications).

hhm is helping many fellows; so in truth, it makes no difference if he's accurate or not (for he and you and me will be judged by the end, not the means). in this case, i don't believe he's right, but it's a good thing to say, for it can change the way you think.

one final point: i hesitated many times in this post, for perhaps there might be one fellow who will say, "hey, that trouble fellow from nauru might be speaking the truth, and i have been excited for days, so i can't stop, and therefore, here goes nothing." he will then proceed to masturbate. firstly, even if there is a build up, you can still stop. secondly, you can choose better. thirdly, who would listen to trouble anyway?

that being said, if the moderators feel that this should be taken down, for it's going against the flow (sorry), go right ahead.
I'm all about that (substantial) bass, no trouble ....

Re: Giving a Genuine Try 24 Nov 2021 05:46 #374542

  • omekhadavar
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Day #11
I made it! I'm back on my best streak for this go-around. Had some pretty intense urges today, but I made it through. I extended my neder last night, which helped me a lot.
Still pretty tired. I'm thinking that I might be sick.
Signing off for the night,
-Dvar Ha'emek
“Stop worrying about the world ending today. It’s already tomorrow in Australia.”
-Charlie Brown

Re: Giving a Genuine Try 24 Nov 2021 11:40 #374544

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It is very normal to have strong urges at this stage. It is a form of withdrawal. Do not panic or obsess about them. You can b'ezras Hashem ignore and even laugh off the urges by reminding yourself that they are not real and you can distract yourself from them. Hatzlacha.
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE

Re: Giving a Genuine Try 25 Nov 2021 04:29 #374567

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Day #12
Pretty standard day. Had urges, let them pass.
Signing off for the night,
-Dvar Ha'emek
“Stop worrying about the world ending today. It’s already tomorrow in Australia.”
-Charlie Brown

Re: Giving a Genuine Try 30 Nov 2021 05:10 #374666

  • omekhadavar
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Day #17
Chanukah has been a great help. I was suffering from withdrawal urges the past couple of days. Chanukah has reinvigorated me and the urges calmed down a-lot. Looking forward to going home for Bein Hazmanim, but I need to make a plan so I don't relapse.

Signing off for the night,
-Dvar Ha'emek
“Stop worrying about the world ending today. It’s already tomorrow in Australia.”
-Charlie Brown

Re: Giving a Genuine Try 30 Nov 2021 12:24 #374667

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Withdrawal is normal and expected. Accept it; do not panic. It is temporary.

Regarding planning for bain hazmanim, realize that "if we fail to plan, we plan to fail". Arrange in advance to stay away from any unfiltered devices even for kosher purposes, and schedule productive days. if you have a partner/mentor here use him alot over the vacation.
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE

Re: Giving a Genuine Try 01 Dec 2021 04:29 #374677

  • omekhadavar
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Day 18
Going Strong.
Signing off for the night, 
-Dvar Ha'emek
“Stop worrying about the world ending today. It’s already tomorrow in Australia.”
-Charlie Brown

Re: Giving a Genuine Try 09 Dec 2021 03:27 #374856

  • omekhadavar
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Had a fall yesterday and today. Made it to 24 days. New record for this time around. That brings me to a total of 39 days clean. I'm going to pick myself up and get going again. I basically fell apart today. Was in a terrible mood and was very tired (maybe I'm just sick?). Tomorrow's going to be a new day.

Signing off for the night, 
-Dvar Ha'emek
“Stop worrying about the world ending today. It’s already tomorrow in Australia.”
-Charlie Brown
Last Edit: 09 Dec 2021 03:27 by omekhadavar.
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