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shua73 gets to 90 and beyond
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Re: shua73 gets to 90 and beyond 18 Apr 2016 19:40 #285054

  • shua73
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still clean here too. In case anyone is interested, I just finished a final. Was up since an hour nap shabbos afternoon till this morning with about an hour nap sometime during those 2 days. life's busy
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You can't make everyone happy, you are not pizza.

Re: shua73 gets to 90 and beyond 19 Apr 2016 20:56 #285308

  • shua73
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just feeling like i really want to check in. still clean.
Just to say something that I learned - I gain a lot by just interacting with other people. I feel that I struggle the most when I feel alone for two reasons.
1. when i'm lonely, I feel down and think that if i just give in and look, I'll be able to avoid the real world and what's making me sad or lonely. It's interesting to me that usually for me it's a way to avoid reality and live in a fantasy world so that I don't have to deal with reality. this also happens to me when I feel overwhelmed. I feel like there's so much to do and not enough time, so I seek an escape because in that fantasy world none of this matters.
2. When I'm alone, I feel that if it's just me and right now I don't care why shouldn't I do it.

So when I interact with other people I don't feel lonely. But more importantly, I don't feel like it's just me. We're doing this together. I compare it to a basketball game. When I play ball by myself after a while I lose interest. But if i'm in a game, my interest lasts much longer. basically, it's more enjoyable to do things with others. so, if I fall, in my head I'm like dude, you're not playing the game. 

Not sure if this is obvious to everybody else, but I found that insightful when I realized it.
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You can't make everyone happy, you are not pizza.

Re: shua73 gets to 90 and beyond 19 Apr 2016 21:29 #285314

  • cordnoy
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How about those who act out with others?
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads:
GYE Handbook | Gibbor's Insights | GYE FAQ - Thanks Skep and DMS123456789 White Book | Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous)

If one gives up at the first sign of a struggle, he is really not ready to be successful."
"Tryin' and doin' are two different thin's - tryin' is hopin'; doin' is succeedin'.
"The right thin' to do and the hard thin' to do are usually the same."


Disclaimer: I am not a cheerleader; B"H, there are many on the site. I am here to change myself, and with God's help, by some mistake, I might even help change others.

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: shua73 gets to 90 and beyond 20 Apr 2016 01:48 #285356

  • shua73
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I don't know because I never had that issue I think if I get what you mean. But, what do you think is the answer to that?
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You can't make everyone happy, you are not pizza.

Re: shua73 gets to 90 and beyond 20 Apr 2016 03:08 #285363

  • inastruggle
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If you're acting out then you aren't connecting to the person right?

Also just because loneliness is a cause of acting out doesn't mean the actual acting out is a manifestation of lonliness.

That was my lomdus for the day.

 
Last Edit: 20 Apr 2016 03:18 by inastruggle.

Re: shua73 gets to 90 and beyond 27 Apr 2016 05:50 #285937

  • shua73
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Something is bothering me. I'm not giving in to my desire to watch porn but instead i now waste my time with other things - meanins the time i used to spend watching is not being used for the importatn things that i need to get done, but rather i occupy myself with something else that i enjoy instead of watching porn. However, I am feeling like there's still something wrong with that since I'm just replacing that addiction with another time waster. although this one is appropriate and porn isn't I am wwondering if this is normal for those who are giving up addiction
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You can't make everyone happy, you are not pizza.

Re: shua73 gets to 90 and beyond 27 Apr 2016 06:19 #285942

  • inastruggle
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Normal for me.

We don't become supermen because we're not watching porn. 

Switching addictions does happen but it sounds like you'rejust wasting time not getting a new addiction.

Time management is hard. Especially when we have internet access. There are a ton of tools to use though. Google it.

Re: shua73 gets to 90 and beyond 27 Apr 2016 12:19 #285950

  • Yaalzu
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Yeah I feel ya. I've refound an old addiction to video games. Surely it's better than what we're leaving behind, but a new challenge to tackle!

Re: shua73 gets to 90 and beyond 27 Apr 2016 13:30 #285957

  • doingtshuva
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shua73 wrote on 27 Apr 2016 05:50:
Something is bothering me. I'm not giving in to my desire to watch porn but instead i now waste my time with other things - meanins the time i used to spend watching is not being used for the importatn things that i need to get done, but rather i occupy myself with something else that i enjoy instead of watching porn. However, I am feeling like there's still something wrong with that since I'm just replacing that addiction with another time waster. although this one is appropriate and porn isn't I am wwondering if this is normal for those who are giving up addiction

Watching porn is addictive!
What your doing now is enjoyable and if I get it right not addictive.
Your right that your still wasting time and not getting things done, but once you free yourself from porn it will be much easier for you to stick to daily daily schedule.
Git moed
 
 NO, It's not all or nothing, just every bit counts!

I failed yesterday, and I might fail tomorrow. But just for today I'm going to give it a try.


Gye program + Handbook  -  Phone conferences  -  Taphsik method  -  90 day chart  -  Ebooks  -  Shiurim  -  Rabbi Dr. Avraham Twerski  -  Recent topics on the Forum

Re: shua73 gets to 90 and beyond 27 Apr 2016 14:20 #285961

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Thanks
smile

You can't make everyone happy, you are not pizza.

Re: shua73 gets to 90 and beyond 27 Apr 2016 15:53 #285968

  • cordnoy
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doingtshuva wrote on 27 Apr 2016 13:30:

shua73 wrote on 27 Apr 2016 05:50:
Something is bothering me. I'm not giving in to my desire to watch porn but instead i now waste my time with other things - meanins the time i used to spend watching is not being used for the importatn things that i need to get done, but rather i occupy myself with something else that i enjoy instead of watching porn. However, I am feeling like there's still something wrong with that since I'm just replacing that addiction with another time waster. although this one is appropriate and porn isn't I am wwondering if this is normal for those who are giving up addiction

Watching porn is addictive!
What your doing now is enjoyable and if I get it right not addictive.
Your right that your still wasting time and not getting things done, but once you free yourself from porn it will be much easier for you to stick to daily daily schedule.
Git moed 

It might be normal, but it is not necessarily the healthiest. Playing video games can also be addictive, and ultimately, it might not be changing us.

On the flipside, it is better than the alternative.

B'hatzlachah
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads:
GYE Handbook | Gibbor's Insights | GYE FAQ - Thanks Skep and DMS123456789 White Book | Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous)

If one gives up at the first sign of a struggle, he is really not ready to be successful."
"Tryin' and doin' are two different thin's - tryin' is hopin'; doin' is succeedin'.
"The right thin' to do and the hard thin' to do are usually the same."


Disclaimer: I am not a cheerleader; B"H, there are many on the site. I am here to change myself, and with God's help, by some mistake, I might even help change others.

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: shua73 gets to 90 and beyond 12 May 2016 01:52 #287565

  • shua73
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I just created a gye group on webchaver is anyone interested in joining? pm me if you're interested. If you're not sure if you're interested, just try it and see how it works out. C'mon everybody we're a family 
smile

You can't make everyone happy, you are not pizza.
Last Edit: 12 May 2016 01:53 by shua73. Reason: added a word

Re: shua73 gets to 90 and beyond 12 May 2016 10:16 #287593

  • doingtshuva
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shua73 wrote on 12 May 2016 01:52:
I just created a gye group on webchaver is anyone interested in joining? pm me if you're interested. If you're not sure if you're interested, just try it and see how it works out. C'mon everybody we're a family
 

Can you please share some more details on your new group?
Who gets the reports? Price?

Thanks
 
 NO, It's not all or nothing, just every bit counts!

I failed yesterday, and I might fail tomorrow. But just for today I'm going to give it a try.


Gye program + Handbook  -  Phone conferences  -  Taphsik method  -  90 day chart  -  Ebooks  -  Shiurim  -  Rabbi Dr. Avraham Twerski  -  Recent topics on the Forum

Re: shua73 gets to 90 and beyond 12 May 2016 15:26 #287613

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Pricing is gradual decrease from 4.99 per month if 2 users till 2.99 a month for 11. Your chaver gets your reports and based on my understanding there is also a group report that evaluates the group as a whole and goes to the admin but individual users can remain anonymous to the admin. It helps cuz there's group accountability also, like a family working together. What do you think?
smile

You can't make everyone happy, you are not pizza.

Re: shua73 gets to 90 and beyond 13 Dec 2016 04:31 #299772

  • shua73
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For all those that are just checking out posts on the way to 90 days. I am now posting in my group group 196. If anyone thinks that they can benefit from a group they should just post. You can informally join/add to the group if you wish.
https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/10-MINI-GYE-COMMUNITIES/299533-Group-196
smile

You can't make everyone happy, you are not pizza.
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