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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

TOPIC: Lomed's Thread 68395 Views

Re: started 90 days as a preparation of lag beomer! 18 Apr 2015 22:40 #252542

  • newaction
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תשועת השם כהרף עין

What it means is that the תשועה from Hashem is in relation to and grows in proportion

of how you keep your eyes guarded. ! בדוק ומנוסה

Hatzlacha in both , your journey to sobriety and your journey to Meron.

Re: started 90 days as a preparation of lag beomer! 19 Apr 2015 02:00 #252554

  • yiraishamaim
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Great newaction - exciting and most motivating

Do you have a source for this?

Re: started 90 days as a preparation of lag beomer! 19 Apr 2015 06:05 #252578

  • newaction
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Yirashamyim you are asking too many kashias on the darshan , .

I can promise it is not mine , i heard it or read it a long time ago.

Let me ask you an honest question , aren't YOU a source of it ?

Re: started 90 days as a preparation of lag beomer! 19 Apr 2015 11:09 #252587

  • yiraishamaim
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Wow!

Some people know how to hit a lot of positive buttons with but a few words

Re: started 90 days as a preparation of lag beomer! 19 Apr 2015 20:07 #252609

  • newaction
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I just love you guys , and Yirashamaim thank you for your encouraging words i deeply
appreciate them.

Re: started 90 days as a preparation of lag beomer! 19 Apr 2015 20:12 #252610

  • lomed
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Thank you all.

As I am planning to fly my stomach is clinging about the challenge of shmiras eineyim that comes with this trip, such as airport, on flight, and in Israel or in meron.

Anyone has any advice on it?
I currently attend live SA meetings. Feel free to reach out to me.

Re: started 90 days as a preparation of lag beomer! 20 Apr 2015 02:52 #252628

  • yiraishamaim
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Sur may'rah Vasei Tov

Make up your mind that you won't be curious with your eyes even on those things which are mutar.
As well bring a couple of sefaring/books - on simple topics that you like. This will keep your eyes and mind on other things.
Every moment you are seeing/thinking appropriate things you are building worlds.

Appreciate your accomplishments.

Re: started 90 days as a preparation of lag beomer! 23 Apr 2015 13:55 #252951

  • cordnoy
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lomed wrote:
One thing is for me very hard, that my wife does not know of all this.

Iam very close to her. Don't have anyone closer to me that her. We are life partners. The fact is that I am challenging a battle. This challenge is one that was till now on the side. What ever I wanted I did , more or less. Now that I am struggling this and facing it, it is not easy. I need her support, I need the feeling from her like wow you are doing gr8. On all my and her challenges up to now we support each other. Now to this challenge I am single!!!!!

I get support from some anonymous friends.

I come home and want to tell her: sweetie can you believe it I am at day 49! If I do so, she will be so down that it will take weeks to repair it


The feelin' in certain parts is found by many.

some words, however, of yours got me to thinkin'.....why do you need her support? for her, or for you? step four and five are all about realizin' that many addicts are very into thinkin' about themselves....I need, my pride, I want, my ego, etc. I know this is true by me. Just sayin'....

b'hatzlachah
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads:
GYE Handbook | Gibbor's Insights | GYE FAQ - Thanks Skep and DMS123456789 White Book | Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous)

If one gives up at the first sign of a struggle, he is really not ready to be successful."
"Tryin' and doin' are two different thin's - tryin' is hopin'; doin' is succeedin'.
"The right thin' to do and the hard thin' to do are usually the same."


Disclaimer: I am not a cheerleader; B"H, there are many on the site. I am here to change myself, and with God's help, by some mistake, I might even help change others.

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: started 90 days as a preparation of lag beomer! 23 Apr 2015 19:40 #252977

  • Bigmoish
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cordnoy wrote:
some words, however, of yours got me to thinkin'.....why do you need her support? for her, or for you? step four and five are all about realizin' that many addicts are very into thinkin' about themselves....I need, my pride, I want, my ego, etc. I know this is true by me. Just sayin'....

b'hatzlachah

An oft found concept on this site is that we keep running away from reality. Whether it's stress, anger, boredom, or restlessness that causes us to run off to the comfort of our vice, it is by all accounts an escape. The more we hide, the easier it is to fall back into the darkness of our souls. We need to expose the vampire of our addiction to the bright light of reality. By being honest with ourselves, our spouses (if possible, practical, and not just a selfish excuse to burden our wives with it), and/or our Rabbeim and mentors, it makes it much easier to recognize the foolishness for what it is.
Handbook | Skep's Tips
My threads:
www.guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/236327-Bigmoish-tries-to-be-good
www.guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/236329-Bigmoishs-path-to-tahara

"Expectation is the mother of frustration" - gibbor120
"Today, damn it! Today!" - cordnoy
"Desiring is not a sin at all, but just a sign that you are not dead yet" - Dov
"We are our own worst observer" - eslaasos's therapist
WDHW!!!

Re: started 90 days as a preparation of lag beomer! 23 Apr 2015 22:35 #252992

  • newaction
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[quote="cordnoy" post=252951][
some words, however, of yours got me to thinkin'.....

b'hatzlachah[/quote]

Harav Cordnoy you have thought us in these forums that thinkin' is always stinkin'

Since when you startin' the mode of thinkin' ? its gettin'confusin'hearin'you speakin'

Re: started 90 days as a preparation of lag beomer! 24 Apr 2015 04:43 #253014

  • yiraishamaim
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I think we got a rapper in the makin'

Re: started 90 days as a preparation of lag beomer! 24 Apr 2015 06:45 #253021

  • newaction
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Thanks Yirais. We addicts still have a Yetzer Hara and sometimes it comes out to surface . I hereby want to give all my respects to harav Cordnoy shlit"a for being a constant and lively inspiration in the GYE forums May Hashem Yisborach Bless him and his family with shefa, broche ve hatzloche in all his endeavors. Vechen all the Chashuve tzibur that form this beautiful community of brotherhood.

Re: started 90 days as a preparation of lag beomer! 24 Apr 2015 14:26 #253045

  • yiraishamaim
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Amen V'chayn Yhi Ratzon

Re: started 90 days as a preparation of lag beomer! 27 Apr 2015 21:06 #253255

  • lomed
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As i Will be In meron, I want to offer that whoever wants me to have him in mind can send me his name in a private message.
I currently attend live SA meetings. Feel free to reach out to me.

Re: started 90 days as a preparation of lag beomer! 27 Apr 2015 21:48 #253258

  • lomed
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Boruch Hashem I am at day 61! This my longest streak since my struggle started. I am proud and very thankful to hashem, I am proud and thankful to GYE.

the fact is, that when I started out my 90 day journey i was pretty sure that i wont make it too long. I was ready to start the 90 day, even if i fall, it is worth each and every day that i will be sober. I was convinced that masturbating is a nature of human kind, and everyone does it. The question is just how many times we do it. I couldn't understand how we are forbidden from doing a thing that it is impossible from keeping ourselves from doing it. Therefore i decided that the most we are obligated to do is ti try to minimize it as much as possible.

As i am working through the 90 day trail, day by day, i feel that i am evolving. I feel that my conclusions are changing to the better. I have lots of work to work on myself, but I do see how foolish I was, that i was thinking that way.

I am looking forward to stay clean. keep reminding myself to work day by day, and with Hashems help move forward to the better.

Thank you all GYE members.
I currently attend live SA meetings. Feel free to reach out to me.
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