Welcome, Guest
Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

TOPIC: Lomed's Thread 69458 Views

Lomed's Thread 25 Feb 2015 16:44 #249399

  • lomed
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 307
  • Karma: 47
I am starting the 90 days. I hope to be bezras hashem this year in miron for lag beomer. although I don't feel much will power now to overcome this struggle, I decided to start a 90 day jurney to try to get clean. I will need much chizuk. but even one day is worth. I hope in zchus of the rashb"ee I will get closer to become clean.
כדאי רבי שמעון לסמוך עליו בשעת הדחק
I currently attend live SA meetings. Feel free to reach out to me.
Last Edit: 01 Feb 2016 21:02 by lomed.

Re: started 90 days as a prepararion of lag beomer! 25 Feb 2015 16:47 #249401

  • Bigmoish
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 1164
  • Karma: 168
Hatzlocha!
Please continue to share your journey with us.
Hopefully it will help to be a preparation for your whole life, not just lag beomer.
Handbook | Skep's Tips
My threads:
www.guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/236327-Bigmoish-tries-to-be-good
www.guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/236329-Bigmoishs-path-to-tahara

"Expectation is the mother of frustration" - gibbor120
"Today, damn it! Today!" - cordnoy
"Desiring is not a sin at all, but just a sign that you are not dead yet" - Dov
"We are our own worst observer" - eslaasos's therapist
WDHW!!!

Re: started 90 days as a prepararion of lag beomer! 25 Feb 2015 16:49 #249403

  • lomed
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 307
  • Karma: 47
what I meant is, that lag beomer was an incentive to start already.
I currently attend live SA meetings. Feel free to reach out to me.

Re: started 90 days as a prepararion of lag beomer! 25 Feb 2015 17:44 #249406

  • lomed
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 307
  • Karma: 47
when all have hisoreros from many things. some it will be a zman like Shabbos or yom tov. another will it be a yeshuah that he needs. people grow from all these hisoreros.

we take any hisoreros as min hashomayim, regardless of what was the cause.
I currently attend live SA meetings. Feel free to reach out to me.

Re: started 90 days as a prepararion of lag beomer! 25 Feb 2015 17:46 #249407

  • Bigmoish
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 1164
  • Karma: 168
Amen. Why don't you share a little of your struggle with us?
What works for you?
Handbook | Skep's Tips
My threads:
www.guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/236327-Bigmoish-tries-to-be-good
www.guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/236329-Bigmoishs-path-to-tahara

"Expectation is the mother of frustration" - gibbor120
"Today, damn it! Today!" - cordnoy
"Desiring is not a sin at all, but just a sign that you are not dead yet" - Dov
"We are our own worst observer" - eslaasos's therapist
WDHW!!!

Re: started 90 days as a prepararion of lag beomer! 25 Feb 2015 18:01 #249408

  • lomed
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 307
  • Karma: 47
to be honest I haven't tried lately much. I can say that in the last 2 years didn't put much effort to get clean.
I have struggles with fantasies and acting out. also shmiras einayim.

although I have a desire for porn and watched a few times, I don't have the challenge on a daily basis. that is because the filters that are installed on my devices. but I watched many love movies on the web.

I had month that this was less often, like 2-3 times a month. but lately it is more like 2- times a week.
I am married with many lechtige kinderlach b"h.

so what more?
I currently attend live SA meetings. Feel free to reach out to me.
Last Edit: 25 Feb 2015 18:03 by lomed.

Re: started 90 days as a prepararion of lag beomer! 26 Feb 2015 05:05 #249450

  • cordnoy
  • OFFLINE
  • Moderator
  • I'm sailin', for I've got to be free
  • Posts: 11535
  • Karma: 582
welcome,

"What more?"

what have you tried in the past in order to recover?
What worked? What didn't?
Is your life unmanageable because of this 'issue'?

b'hatzlachah

don't be a stranger.
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads:
GYE Handbook | Gibbor's Insights | GYE FAQ - Thanks Skep and DMS123456789 White Book | Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous)

If one gives up at the first sign of a struggle, he is really not ready to be successful."
"Tryin' and doin' are two different thin's - tryin' is hopin'; doin' is succeedin'.
"The right thin' to do and the hard thin' to do are usually the same."


Disclaimer: I am not a cheerleader; B"H, there are many on the site. I am here to change myself, and with God's help, by some mistake, I might even help change others.

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: started 90 days as a prepararion of lag beomer! 26 Feb 2015 15:59 #249483

  • lomed
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 307
  • Karma: 47
hi,
day one is over. I felt like a cloud around me. I don't know why. like something telling me don't don't don't all day. I don't usually think about this much till now. but this day was like in a fear!!

but bh it is over. today things are calming down. and be"h I will try to take a day at a time or an even an hour at a time.

cordnoy, you asked if my life is unmanageable? well bh it is manageable. and don't foresee that this issue should cause my life to become unmanageable.
I currently attend live SA meetings. Feel free to reach out to me.

Re: started 90 days as a prepararion of lag beomer! 26 Feb 2015 16:09 #249484

  • reallygettingthere
  • Current streak: 72 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 759
  • Karma: 27
Hi Lomed,

If your issues with lust are sporadic and infrequent, perhaps the hisoirerus a Meron etc. will help. If your struggle is more frequent and regular, one hisoirerus even a big one isn't likely to change you life. when we run to feed our lust regularly we need to investigate what is driving us there. There usually is a much deeper answer than, "I like hot women"

Eli
Roy in the SA White Book noted that we frequently prayed and it did not work...because the best we could muster was begging G-d to "Please take it away, so I will not have to give it up!

No amount of sobriety can cure the insanity -ChaimCharlie

The emmes hurts but fake chizzuk will hurt more -Bards

Remember, best block, no be there - Mr. Miyagi

Re: started 90 days as a prepararion of lag beomer! 26 Feb 2015 16:18 #249486

  • lomed
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 307
  • Karma: 47
what do you have in mind by much deeper answer?
I currently attend live SA meetings. Feel free to reach out to me.

Re: started 90 days as a prepararion of lag beomer! 26 Feb 2015 16:24 #249487

  • reallygettingthere
  • Current streak: 72 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 759
  • Karma: 27
Every one has different issues. For me, I had unfortunately developed the habit of running to porn as a way of self medicating to deal with stress. If I didn't/don't (still working on it and probably always will be) learn to deal with stress I will have a much harder time dealing with the addiction (in my case it's an addiction). It's not just a matter of filters. Filter don't solve the problem they treat a symptom

(Disclaimer: Filters are great and should be used, but if the root problem is not addressed, the filter will not stop you from lusting)
Roy in the SA White Book noted that we frequently prayed and it did not work...because the best we could muster was begging G-d to "Please take it away, so I will not have to give it up!

No amount of sobriety can cure the insanity -ChaimCharlie

The emmes hurts but fake chizzuk will hurt more -Bards

Remember, best block, no be there - Mr. Miyagi

Re: started 90 days as a prepararion of lag beomer! 26 Feb 2015 16:28 #249488

  • lomed
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 307
  • Karma: 47
the message that I am getting from the rabonim is that without a filter no one can be trusted. ur saying that is for someone that is not an addict. but for someone that is an addict a filter will not help. right?
I currently attend live SA meetings. Feel free to reach out to me.

Re: started 90 days as a prepararion of lag beomer! 26 Feb 2015 16:33 #249489

  • reallygettingthere
  • Current streak: 72 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 759
  • Karma: 27
Correct

Ha boteiach b'libo k'sil yikarei if there is another path and one goes past a house of immorality one is a rasha. The definition of darka achrina is a question.

When it come to an addict although gedarim can help they don't treat the root issue. Making too many gedarim often goes together with ignoring the real issue.
Roy in the SA White Book noted that we frequently prayed and it did not work...because the best we could muster was begging G-d to "Please take it away, so I will not have to give it up!

No amount of sobriety can cure the insanity -ChaimCharlie

The emmes hurts but fake chizzuk will hurt more -Bards

Remember, best block, no be there - Mr. Miyagi

Re: started 90 days as a prepararion of lag beomer! 02 Mar 2015 20:31 #249768

  • lomed
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 307
  • Karma: 47
bh I m at day 5 and still clean.

however I am somewhat in this fear of fall area. meaning that some kind of obsession (that I never have) is telling me all day, watch watch don't fall don't fall.

it is a bit annoying.
I currently attend live SA meetings. Feel free to reach out to me.

Re: started 90 days as a prepararion of lag beomer! 02 Mar 2015 20:33 #249769

  • Bigmoish
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 1164
  • Karma: 168
Isn't that better than the obsession that tells you "Fall! Fall!"?
Handbook | Skep's Tips
My threads:
www.guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/236327-Bigmoish-tries-to-be-good
www.guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/236329-Bigmoishs-path-to-tahara

"Expectation is the mother of frustration" - gibbor120
"Today, damn it! Today!" - cordnoy
"Desiring is not a sin at all, but just a sign that you are not dead yet" - Dov
"We are our own worst observer" - eslaasos's therapist
WDHW!!!
Time to create page: 0.51 seconds

Are you sure?

Yes